Are all truly welcome if we only speak to ourselves?

By John Hamer, Director of Outreach & Innovative Mission

Churches from many denominations put signs out in front of their doors that read “All are welcome.”  Most are placed with honest intent by church members who believe that their congregation is welcoming.  But being truly welcoming isn’t as easy as saying so.  Humans by nature are most comfortable with people they already know and next most comfortable with people who feel familiar — who look and act more or less like they do. Being truly welcoming requires effort on the part of members within the church—both congregations and camp communities—to learn about issues different people experience.  

If a congregation in a particular country includes only natives of the country, they may not be aware of issues faced by members of the immigrant community.  People from a nation’s historically dominant or privileged race do not share the experience of individuals from one that experiences regular discrimination.  We are not born understanding issues faced by members of the transgender community.  For this reason, Community of Christ’s affiliate Harmony sponsors a program that helps congregations learn how to become truly affirming and welcoming.  If you’re part of a local congregation of the church and would like to find out how you can participate in the program, the details are on their website:  Harmony.lgbt

Even congregations with the best intentions of being welcoming can be unwelcoming.  When someone is writing a sermon, a lesson, or a prayer, the audience they picture is usually the people they know — the same members of the church who come back week after week.    Those regulars share the same experience, language, and traditions of what church is and what church means.  And since everyone knows what we do in church, people never think to explain what it is we’re doing and why.  And that works fine when everyone’s in the know.  But it fails to work when a new person walks into the church and doesn’t know what’s going on.  The church has unintentionally become unwelcoming.  

When I travel across Canada and around the world, I love to tour the Community of Christ buildings and campgrounds that exist in each location.  These always have their own unique character and back story.  One of the first things I do is ask:  what about this space says “Community of Christ”?  How does this building communicate our particular distinctives? Next, I try to think to myself:  what would this look like to someone who has no prior experience with Community of Christ? What does it say about us as a sacred community? Sometimes I’m pleasantly surprised by welcome centers that tell our story, share our principles, and our initiatives. 

For myself, each week as I lead a team preparing the component parts of our Beyond the Walls worship services, I try to be welcoming by going through a similar exercise.  When I read the text of a sermon, lesson, or prayer, I ask myself:  what would someone joining us for the first time make of this or that phrase?  If it’s completely opaque, can we add a sentence or even a few words to introduce the idea and give it context?   It’s not the easiest thing to do — and, moreso, it’s not the easiest thing to remember to do.

As a church, I think Community of Christ members desire to be true to our word that “all are welcome.”  But as with so many things, being truly welcoming requires self-reflection, thought, and effort.  As you go through the next week sharing in church-related activities as a leader or participant, I invite you to go through this same exercise.  Ask yourself, if you had no experience with the church, would you understand what was being said during this worship service or in this camping activity?  You may be pleased to find that people are already doing a good job of making sure we’re explaining ourselves to others.  Or we may uncover subtle or even substantial areas for improvement.  Let’s be intentional about being welcoming.  Let’s say “All are welcome” and truly mean it.